sometimes there's poems

decadent
dripping with darkness
and glamour
the brightest beauty
tarnished in the light
magnificent
in the dark and dusty
halls of this
crumbling
decaying
dream
filled with eternal
night.

a short piece

have heart, she said as the rain pattered on the tin roof. life isn't always easy, but someday things will be better. someday, you'll understand. 

her hand rested briefly on my head, fingers lacing through my hair. then, just like that, she was gone - running down the walk, purse held above her head to provide some small protection, the bracelets on her right wrist jingling as she handed her suitcase to the taxi driver. faux fur coat and shiny peach heels the last memory of her as she disappeared.

years passed on that porch and she was right: it wasn't always easy, but it did get better - much better without her. we lived on and flourished, happy with our lot in life the hint of our sadness and confusion hidden beneath bright smiles.

no, mom, i whisper to the memory from time to time, no, i'll never understand.

summer slipping away

oh hey, so i’m alive i think…too much work, a week away (cali and disneyland for the first time ever), and then a ton more work. been trying not to fall asleep at, like, 6pm, as it means i wake up at random hours and have to force myself back to bed soon thereafter. new dolls came in, i fought with the post office, i have a ton of photos to process. drunk harry potter was a thing at an event. um…that’s all i can remember right now. i can’t believe it is already august. why is it already august? WHY??? 

sometimes i write

sometimes i wonder
if i prick my fingers
will my blood flow red
or glowing glitter
burn with the fire
of dreams and songs
sung only in the ether
lost in the night
of perpetual silence
will my heart beat
slither away
to nothing
quiet
until a spark again ignites
roiling consumptive inspiration
to the tallest spires
whereupon only thought remains
to watch the falling stars
as they rain
upon the shores
like tiny points of fire
setting the world ablaze.

one month on...

so a good month has passed since i last posted (as usual) and things are somewhat better. i managed to get caught up as of yesterday all because i worked from home and didn't have to take calls for a week. the reason i didn't have to take calls for a week? i was on a work trip. first person from my department to be sent on a client on-site ever. i got to go see a client that i've been working with as their exclusive person for one of our products for over a year now, which was cool. it was a nice, though quick, trip.

.:more after the jump:.